Rated: 100% (1 votes)
Loading ...On the Rain-Slick Precipice of Darkness.
Big_Adam
“Four Gods move on the windowsill, where erst octad Gods did struggle and will. And if the Gods themselves haw die, what does that feature for you and I?”
The opening line to “On the Rain-Slick Precipice of Darkness” the game/comic from the chaps of Penny Arcade. As I love this game I’ve decided to do a little review.
Game;
The basic of the game follows you (player) on a nice morning in New Arcadia (well, after you make you character fitting the Penny Arcade style). After some intro you start to rake (stay with me) which then results in your house being flattened.
From there, you and your trusty rake carve your way through Fruit Fuckers, Mimes, Hobo’s and a brilliant collection of freaks and weirdo’s along with Gabe and Tycho.
Game play;
The game play is a mix of quick real time and slight turn based fighting. You can just keep hammering attacks but if you wait they build up to a sort of “super” move of sorts. Most people seem to hate the old turn based system but it really works well in the OtRSPoD (no, I’m not writing “On the Rain-Slick Precipice of Darkness” every time) it’s quick enough to be enjoyable and hectic enough to make you think. You can just hammer enemies with the basic attack or you can use various items (ranging from stupid to brilliant) to help. Just hammering enemies will only take you so far, you have to start to use tactic at some point (Xbox live Halo players need not apply). When not fighting you’re either questing or wondering about. You can skip some quests entirely (like the Hobo “quality” meat quest) but their all fairly fun and not too difficult.
Style;
The whole game is a sort of steam punk/Victorian/Penny Arcade mix and it’s all in a 3D/2D (for comic bit) style and it really looks rather good. It fit the style of Penny Arcade beautifully and because the whole game was made by Tycho and Gabe it all looks right. As you’re playing you recognise some characters and giggle like a school girl at the new ones (like the Professor of Urology who basically just pees … on everything. In a scientific way though). If you’re a fan of the comic you’ll love the style of it as it just works.
Music/Sounds;
Big problems with brining comics to life are voices. Look at Dilbert or even CAD when they became animated. In your head you always have an idea of how they sound to you. So, how dose Penny Arcade over come this problem? Simple, no one talks. Being a comic they stuck with the comic way of doing things, with speech bubbles. Not to say there’s no voice work. A slightly Lesley Phillips (hell, might even be him. Not sure) sounding narrator guides you along and stop the game being too stagnant from all the reading. Bar the narrator, the only other voice sounds you get are the odd evil laugh and song from a hobo bin man.
As for music, the game uses a nice set of orchestra sounds and song to give some gravitas to the situation in the game and give the game more death. Again, for the style of the game it really works well.
Graphics;
Graphically the game isn’t too demanding. Okay it’s some all singing, all dancing super graphics engine that make Crisis crumble. It’s a good solid looking game with some nice attack effects but the simple look compliments it. The environments never look dull. Everything looks good, turn it all up and enjoy it. Even the older computers can play it nicely.
System Specs;
Minimum:
OS: Windows® 2000/XP/Vista™ with latest updates
Processor: Pentium® III, AMD Athlon™ 1.0 GHz or better
Memory: 512 MB of available system memory
Graphics: ATI Radeon™ 9500 or better, NVIDIA GeForce™ FX 5200 or better, Intel® GMA 950 or better with 64 MB of video memory (shared or dedicated)*
Sound: OS-supported sound card
Hard Drive: 350 MB of available hard drive space (185 MB installed)
Input Devices: OS-supported keyboard and mouse
*All video cards require latest drivers supporting OpenGL®.
Recommended:
Processor: Pentium® IV, AMD Athlon™ 1.5 GHz or better
Memory: 768 MB of available system memory
Graphics: ATI Radeon™ or better, NVIDIA GeForce™ or better video card with 128 MB of video memory*
Sound: 16-bit stereo- or surround-capable sound card with latest drivers
Right, that’s enough about the game. Here are some good and bad points.
Good Points;
• Awesome story.
• Great Characters.
• It all works right. Just feels correct.
• Fruit Fuckers!
• “Pure” liquid (if you played it, you’ll know).
• Fights are more than mindless “hack at it” play.
Bad Points;
• Mimes, god damned mimes.
• Level system seemed to level up enemies as well. So the more hardcore you got, the harder they got.
• Semi-static camera. You gone 3D why keep the camera in one plain.
• Nope, that all I got.
Conclusion;
I really enjoyed OtRSPoD I still have yet to finish it (damn boss battles). I liked the silly script, the character banter, the fruit fuckers, the look, the fell of the game. It’s just a really well done game that keeps you happy while playing it. The only bit I really didn’t enjoy was a fight with some super mime thing, kept kicking my arse. Still, overall the game just works. I’m a big fan of Penny Arcade so this game worked for me; it hit all the right fan buttons for me.
So give it a shot. It’s cheap on Steam this weekend and there’s going to be more.
Go on, go and get it!
Media;
Rated: 60% (2 votes)
Loading ...Wall-E and GLaDOS.
Big_Adam
Being the sort of chap I am, I’ve recently been looking for anything Wall-E related since it’s coming out soon.
I’ve watched trailer, clips, interviews, specials and … other things.
Anyway, the film is absolutely STUFFED with references to past robots and great robot points.
Look at Wall-E himself … itself. He’s a little robot who has a personality on a world full of rubbish. He also has one hell of a likeness to Johnny 5. Really, I mean it. Wall-E is a hell of a lot like the old J-5 from the 80’s. He inquisitive and a bit dumb because of it.
Then there’s Auto. Auto is the ships wheel and as far as I can tell, distant relative to GLaDOS of Portal fame. Well, if GLaDOS got it on with HAL 9000 from “2001 a Space Odyssey”. I mean, look at him. He’s white, black, smooth and awesome looking and looks a bit like GLaDOS when viewed from below (GLaDOS has various pipe work connecting her to the rest of the labs so looks a bit like the wheel).
Anyway, that’s about it. Can you tell I have nothing to do today?
Wall-E is out on the 18th of this month. Being Pixar it will be awesome.
Rated: 100% (1 votes)
Loading ...TF2 - Rumors of Heavy and Sniper Unlocks.
Big_Adam
It seems rumbling of the engi unlocks being next might not be true. A French fellow digging around the TF2 sound files found some new and interesting taunt sound that seem like they might be for the new unlocks. Fun part is there are both Heavy and Sniper sound leading the entire TF2 community to go “Ooow, new stuff”.
The two original Steam threads.
As well as the sounds a picture of the new Heavy unlock have floated up onto the internet. No confirmation of this and if it’s a fake it’s a damn good one but;
As you can see it’s a rather harsh looking thing. Thing is it looks to be like a VERY heavy sniper cannon with five shots. I’ve always found the heavy to be good at just scaring the crap out the other team. Only giving him five shots short of screws that over.
Than again could all just be a fake.
Oh well, time will tell.
Thanks to the chaps and lady of the O.C. forum for the info.
Not yet rated
Loading ...I Go All Elitist.
Big_Adam
Much in the way of Spider Jerusalem, I feel a column coming on … well a blog … you get the idea.
As you all know I’m a great fan of TF2. I play it allot (50 odd hours in two weeks) and normally only play on one server as it’s the server I like with the people I like.
Problem is, having played on a server I like with people I like; I’ve started to get all elitist. As more new players flood onto the server, the problem of idiots playing grows. I know I shouldn’t get pissed off with new players but crappit, they all tend to be dumb as a sack of spuds. Take an example today on OilRig, a big fairly complex map I’ve been on a few times.
Spawn on map and as I medic have to follow people. I have no problem with the people I normally play with. Baz, Rummy, Monster all know what I’m like and do the thing of listening. So I following some guy and über him (mistake, big one) then spend the next 10secs going; “Dude, left. Left, man. On the left, F**KING LEFT” über runs out and the demo man on the left kills us both. So I don’t bother healing anyone, change to sniper and pop a few head (okay 2 with 25 shots. I’m a crap sniper) till the boring ass round ends.
People don’t seem to get that Team Fortress 2 is a TEAM game and should be played as such, even just a little. Was me and Baz again and even Baz was getting frustrated at everyone for being complete tits. Few round later some more [O.C. Regs] turn up and we get a good game in then I bugger off to Top Gear.
I know I should probably give the new people a chance but what’s the point when they all seem to act like complete tits. One end you got the clueless tit and the other end of the spectrum is the noisy balless tit with a voice so high it cracks glass. These people get muted as they fall into the “John Gabriel’s greater internet fuckwad theory” and shouldn’t be allowed near a mic.
It just gets very frustrating with new players. They just don’t seem to know what’s going. Rather than ask they screw about and act like tits. Did find one decent person today who I asked to fix my mate Burny’s SG which he nicely did so that’s the plus, some people are not tits.
I just been wanting a good game all day and it has yet to emerge. Okay the Ninjas and O do tend to be a giggle even if it’s via text but still.
Bloody (I’m going to say it) noobs.
Rated: 100% (2 votes)
Loading ...Achievements; Honest Vs. Farmed.
Big_Adam
Last Thursday the new Pyro stuff came out for Team Fortress two along with some tweaks and some new flashy bit and what have you.
With new items come the constant of achievement to unlock the new stuff. Which normally results in allot of running about going; “one more kill with the axe and I get my ach …. F**KER SHOT ME!” or a similar sort of thing.
This is why I farm achievement now. Yes it’s a horrible dirty thing but still I wanted the new stuff and I really hate attempting to get achievements. Although allot of the ones with the pyro update you could get over time. Roast 50 heavy’s, destroy X number of Y. It was all stuff you could get over time. I chose to farm it for time and just wanting stuff.
If you never farmed achievements before it’s a horrible soul crushing thing to do. Even worse on an achievement server as you have on ass with a mic playing crap rap music and killing people. So now I use bots which is just as bad.
I farmed my stuff. Went online. Got slated for farming and went about my day.
As there are still a fair too many pyros about I decided to stick with medic and engi for the time being. I got all but one medic achievement and was working towards it (the kill/assist in killing 10 nemesis) so hoped onto the O.C. server and played away.
Mid-way though Pl_GoldRush something happened? I got my last medic achievement. I was bloody ecstatic with glee. I whooped and shouted down my mic and equipped my Uber-Bonesaw.
You know, I really wish I didn’t farm all my pyro ones now. I’ve screwed my scores right over and people really rag on you if you do get via farming. Then again, if I didn’t farm I would play JUST to get the achievement so it’s pretty much the same thing but more annoying.
So, in future I’ll do a bit of a mix. Some farming, some proper play. Some things though I can never see how you would get them UNLESS you farm them. The medic ones like healing 10,000 in one life I could never get near. The pyro ones are allot more softcore in comparison though.
Anyway, that’s about it. Bit rambly and point but sod it.
Rated: 96% (5 votes)
Loading ...TF2 Pyro Stuff REVEALED!
Big_Adam
Right!
Just found all this stuff so I’m splatter gunning it into a post.
Ready?
Pyro Weapons;
The Flare Gun;
“The first Pyro unlockable is The Flare Gun, which replaces the shotgun. It allows the Pyro to ignite an enemy at long range, but does require careful aim on their part. It’s particularly useful for causing havoc on Snipers and Engineers who want to keep their distance.”
Sounds like a crap load of fun!
The Backburner;
“The second Pyro unlockable is The Backburner. This flamethrower is built for the Pyro who likes to ambush their opponents. It removes the compression blast capability, instead guaranteeing critical hits whenever it’s used on an opponent from behind. To aid in survivability, it grants the Pyro an extra fifty health.”
Right, the stock pyro thrower is getting a compression blast. In that it can fire a compressed ball of air and force things away from the pyro, rockets, scouts that type of stuff. This new weapon removes that BUT adds in the crits and extra health!
The Axtinguisher;
The third Pyro unlockable is The Axtinguisher. This mighty axe guarantees critical hits on any enemy that’s currently on fire, although it’s significantly weaker against enemies who aren’t. A great combination with the The Flare Gun, or with another Pyro buddy riding alongside doing the igniting.
Maps;
Two new maps. Both made by people who love TF2.
Turbine - A CTF map but a non-crap one. It’s a real hoot to get a couple SG spots and decimate the other team. A well balanced map with fun spots for all. Really good map glad it’s offical now.
Fastlane - Never played so here’s the blurb from the site;
“A control point map with five points, in the style of Badlands. Its symmetrical layout provides for high-speed and well balanced gameplay, while the multiple indoor routes, connected to larger outdoor arenas, provide a wide set of interesting and varied combat spaces. The arena-style control points require solid teamwork to capture and hold. ”
Achivments;
Combined Fire: Use your shotgun to finish off 20 players you’ve ignited.
Firewall: Ignite 5 Spies who have a sapper on a friendly building.
Cooking the Books: Ignite 5 enemies carrying your intelligence.
Spontaneous Combustion: Ignite 10 cloaked Spies.
Trailblazer: Ignite 10 enemies that have recently used a teleporter.
Camp Fire: Kill 3 enemies in a row, all within the same area.
Lumberjack: Kill 3 people with your axe in one life.
Clearcutter: Kill 6 people with your axe in one life.
Firewatch: Ignite 10 snipers while they are zoomed in.
Burn Ward: Ignite 3 medics that are ready to deploy an Uber-charge.
Makin’ Bacon: Kill 50 Heavies with your flamethrower.
Plan B: Kill 10 enemies while you’re both underwater.
Pyrotechnics: Kill 3 enemies in a single uber-charge.
Arsonist: Destroy 50 Engineer buildings.
Controlled Burn: Ignite 50 enemies capturing one of your control points.
Dead Heat: Kill an enemy in the same second that he kills you.
Pilot Light: Ignite a rocket-jumping Soldier while he’s in midair.
Freezer Burn: Provide enemies with freezecam shots of each of your taunts.
Hot on Your Heels: Kill 50 enemies with your flamethrower, from behind.
Next of Kindling: Ignite an enemy, and the Medic healing him.
Second Degree Burn: Kill a burning enemy who was ignited by another Pyro.
Weenie Roast: Have 2 enemy Scouts on fire at the same time.
Baptism by Fire: Force 10 burning enemies to jump into water.
Fire and Forget: Kill 15 players while you’re dead.
I Fry: Ignite 10 disguised Spies.
OMGWTFBBQ: Kill an enemy with a taunt.
Got A Light?: Ignite an enemy Spy while he’s flicking a cigarette.
BarbeQueQ: Cause a dominated player to leave the server.
Dance Dance Immolation: Kill 3 enemies while they’re taunting.
Hotshot: Kill a Soldier with a reflected critical rocket.
Firefighter: Kill 500 enemies.
Fire Chief: Kill 1000 enemies
Attention Getter: Ignite 100 enemies with the flare gun.
Pyromancer: Do 1 million points of total fire damage.
Hot Potato: Reflect 100 projectiles with your compressed air blast.
>>Full Set Of Achivment Icons.<<
So there it all is. Ready and waiting. Will write more later as this is my lunch break. Cheers to the guys at The O.C. for point this out.
OFFICAL PYRO AND NEW MAP SITE FROM VALVE
Rated: 100% (1 votes)
Loading ...TF2; Free Weekend, Pyro Stuff & Sniper Video
Big_Adam
Yay TF2!
The boys over at Valve have been working away and the new updates are coming out for this weekend along with a free weekend!
Lets start though with the new “Meet The” video.
Newest video from the good TF2 boys is “Meet The Sniper”. They seem to have gone a bit differently from previous videos with this. Where as meet the Engi, Scout, Demo where all set inside of maps and the TF2 world we know and love. Meet The Sniper (MTS) is set just in the real world with the sniper as a hired assassin of sort.
So you see him driving an RV, drinking coffee, hacking people up and peeing in jars. So it’s a bit different, but it’s still damn good. It’s still funny, smooth and very damn slick. It’s funny as well from the sniper phoning up his mum.
Anyway, that’s the MTS video.
Pyro Updates, oddly very little has been said about the stuff the pyro is getting. The most I’ve heard if the Axtinguisher which causes a crit for any hit on an enemy on fire, so the Q button is going to get work out with that.
The only other thing if from the MST video, for a few frames you can see what looks like a flare gun, just a big, slightly toy looking sort of gun. Here’s a random pic taken from the MTS video.
Finally.
TF2 is having ANOTHER FREE WEEKEND. This coupled with the pyro updates (meant to be some tweaks and new maps) means the game is going to be flooded with idiots and pyro spamming. Still, if you never had a go it’s worth a shot. It’s a good fun game and if you’re lucky you’ll have a good giggle playing even if there are nothing but pyros running about. Going to lag allot of systems like hell with all that fire kicking about but, oh well.
Rated: 100% (1 votes)
Loading ...I Play Spore Creator.
Big_Adam
Well, unless you’ve been living under a rock you would have heard of Spore by now.
No?
Really?
Well it’s from the people who have made Sim-insert-random-subject-here games Maxis and is the game that seems to have many going “oooow” over. The idea of the game is to be a god of sorts. No really, you design a little life and let it grow. You start at the single celled level and work your way up to space exploration. Really, it looks rather good.
Thus, being good someone leaked the demo of it early. So I decided to sneak a peek.
After smuggling the demo to my lair I installed it and fire it up. You’re greeted by a few EA/Maxis messages about “this is a demo blah blah” and the like. Then you get to the main sort of screen which to anyone who’s played The Sims will recognise.
Hit the create creature button and your off.
Off to a pink blob. At first it seems a bit crap, till you realise you can mess about with what little bone structure there is. You can pull, twist, stretch it for all it’s worth and that’s just the body.
Moving on you’ll want arms (you don’t need them but meh) which again you can pull, twist, rotate and generally do what ever the crap you like. Really it’s like having a mass of play dough to mess about with. If you don’t like something you can just twist it and stretch it until you do with your godly mouse powers.
Several minutes of twiddling I let my creature walk!
I shall call him Wobbly.
I found that because of where his … it’s .. err .. knees are placed it walked backwards. So I made a pink abomination with backwards legs, a freaky mouth and thumpers.
Thing is, it’s fun to mess with. You watch this thing you made walk and move really rather well. It doesn’t look wrong. It moves as you would expect it. It sort of lumbers about being tall and squawking away at anything it wanted to.
I let it walk around, played with its emotions and general enjoyed its short tragic life (didn’t save Wobbly, the shame).
So, Spore demo impression; It’s pretty damn good really. It’s still sort of early but it’s fun just to make a creature and let it lumber about then try to improve it. Go for a freak or something more human. Or as the guys at Kotaku have done, recreate the Fruit Fucker from Penny Arcade because you can.
I await the MONSTER that will be Spore. It’s going to be damn good for everyone who wanted to control a tiny virtual life.
Edit.
Another DNA abortions I made.
Right, the arms. Well … my mouse slipped and … errm … yeah.
Not yet rated
Loading ...Tf2 - Look at Pyro Stuff!
Big_Adam
Well, I seem to always be the last person to find this stuff out but Valve have bought out a picture as well as some info on the new Pyro melee weapon coming out in the next big whoring update.
Here’s the Steam blurb: -
“We’ve almost completely wrapped up the next big release for Team Fortress 2, which will focus on the Pyro class, along with the Meet the Sniper movie. We’ve spent time looking at how the recent Medic release went, and have rolled feedback from that release into the new item designs for the Pyro and into the design of the achievements required to unlock those items. One item, shown here in concept form, will be the Axtinguisher. Although it does about half of normal damage to standard run-of-the-mill non-burning enemies, once you light someone on fire the Axtinguisher will guarantee a critical hit.
Along with all of the new content, we’re also going to be making some significant changes to the Pyro class for everyone, regardless of whether they have unlocked any new items.”
So that all sounds lovely. My only problem is with “we’re also going to be making some significant changes”. This to me translates as “we’re going to cock up pyro class”. I think it might be like the demo and having the ammo chopped in half.
Ah well, we’ll have to see what happens. All I do know is much whoring will happen.
~Thanks to Kotaku for original link~
Rated: 100% (1 votes)
Loading ...15mins Of Red Alert 3.
Big_Adam
Well, looks like EA are already starting to pump the Red Alert pony and have bought out a 15min video of Red Alert 3 game play.
>> 15mins of youtube Red Alert 3<<
Well, 15mins isn’t much but still it’s Red Alert. Let me say this now, I F’ING LOVED Red Alert 2. I used to play it with my mate Fred. I was normally America (to get extra paratroopers) and Fred was … well Fred normally died in 15min as his base got bombed massively. We used to have epic fights vs the computer. Spies, engi’s, super weapons, the lot! Would last for an hour then we’d either be dead or win. Simple as.
Now, the new Red Alert 3. Well, errm … it’s Red Alert 2 with 3D and more naval based. No, really it’s the same game. Even the voices are the same as the last one. Who could forget what the Tesla troopers sounded like! The only diffrences I can see from 2 to 3 are;
1) Trees now fall down (used to have to bomb the crap out of them).
2) Ore mining is now stupidly simple. What the hells is the point of an “ore node”. Go mine for it from a field for crap sake like your suppose to!
3) Naval elements. Used to be the sea was safe, secure. You could hide some backup in the sea. Now you got to worry about getting attacked by GIANT rolling death boat tanks of doom!
4) MAN CANNON! Whoop!
5) … thats about it. No wait, Vac bombs and robots!
Really, I was expecting more. Although, the RA series is a classic and if you dick on it too much people would kick up a fuss (although EA would never listen) . Still, have to wait and see if they have screwed the series or if they made it “better”.
Still, being EA it’s bound to have f’ing adverts in it.